‘We’ll discuss this later.’ William dismisses it too easily. ‘But for now you keep this between us.’
‘He knows.’ Miller’s confession draws a shocked gasp from behind me, but he continues before William can interrogate him. ‘He found Olivia buying a pregnancy test.’
‘Oh Jesus,’ William mutters, tensing my shoulders. Miller catches my reaction and moves his palm to my neck. ‘You don’t need me to tell you that you’ve just doubled his ammo.’
‘No, I don’t.’
‘What did he say?’
‘I don’t know. I wasn’t there.’
‘Where the fuck were you?’
‘Being sent on a treasure hunt.’
I bite my lip and nuzzle farther under Miller’s chin, feeling so guilty and even more stupid. ‘He was friendly.’ My words are muffled against Miller’s suit jacket. ‘Or trying to be. I knew he was bad news.’
William lets out a snap of sardonic laughter. ‘That man is friendly like a poisonous snake. Did he touch you?’
I shake my head no, certain I’m doing the right thing by keeping that little piece of my encounter with Charlie to myself.
‘Did he threaten you?’
Again, I shake my head. ‘Not directly.’
‘Right.’ William’s tone has taken on an edge of decisiveness. ‘Now’s the time to stop thinking and start doing. You don’t want to go to war with him, Hart. If it’s not too late already. Charlie only knows how to win.’
‘I know what needs to be done,’ Miller states.
I don’t like the sense of William tensing behind me, nor the increased thump of Miller’s heartbeat under my ear.
‘Not an option,’ William says quietly. ‘Don’t even go there.’
Glancing over my shoulder to him, I find sheer refusal on William’s face. So I take my questioning eyes back to Miller, and though he knows damn well that I’m looking at him in confusion, he doesn’t tear his cool impassiveness away from William.
‘Don’t go all sentimental on me, Anderson. I can see no other way.’
‘I’ll think of one.’ William spells the words out through a tight jaw, revealing his disgust. ‘You’re thinking the impossible.’
‘Nothing is impossible anymore.’ Miller moves away from me, leaving me feeling exposed and defenceless, and takes down two glasses. ‘I never thought someone could claim me so entirely.’ He sets about filling the glasses with scotch. ‘I never even thought about it because who wants to consider the impossible?’ He turns and slides one of the glasses over to William. ‘Who wants to dream about what they can’t have?’
I can see with perfect clarity that Miller’s words are striking an emotional chord in William. His silence and the slow wrapping of his fingers around his glass say so.
A relationship with Gracie Taylor was impossible.
‘I didn’t think there was someone out there who was capable of really loving me,’ Miller goes on. ‘I didn’t think there was someone out there who defied everything I knew.’ He takes a long swig of his drink, keeping his eyes on William, who’s shifting uncomfortably on his stool, playing with his glass. ‘Then I found Olivia Taylor.’
My heart leaps in my chest and I vaguely register William downing his drink and swallowing hard. ‘Is that so?’ he asks. He’s on the defence.
‘That’s so.’ Miller raises his glass to William and finishes his drink. It’s the most sarcastic toast in the history of toasts, because he knows what William is thinking. He’s thinking he wishes he could turn back time. I, however, don’t. Everything that has happened has led me to Miller. He is my destiny.
All of William’s regrets, my regrets, my mother’s mistakes, and Miller’s dark past have brought me to now. And though this situation is destroying us, it’s ultimately making us as well. ‘I’ll tell you something else that’s not impossible for me,’ Miller continues, like he’s getting a thrill from torturing William, making him live through his regrets. He points a blind finger in my direction. ‘Fatherhood. I have no fear because no matter how fucked up I am, no matter how scared I am that some of my screwed-up genes will pass down to my flesh and blood, I know Olivia’s beautiful soul will eclipse it.’ He looks across at me and steals my breath with his sincerity. ‘Our child will be as perfect as she is,’ he whispers. ‘Soon I’ll have two bright beautiful lights in my world, and it’s my job to protect them. So, Anderson –’ his face hardens and he returns his attention to a silent William – ‘are you going to help me, or am I taking on the immoral bastard alone?’